I don’t know why I decided to share our master bedroom with my birth story. Maybe because this is where me and my baby spend a whole lot of our time together? She is still currently sleeping in here with me in a bassinet tucked right next to my side of the bed- so I can easily snatch her up when she starts fussing in the night to nurse. Like the rest of our house, the master was changed a little bit during my psychotic need to nest everywhere. Postnatal nesting is real, too.
Read below for birth story.
Tuesday, Dec. 9, I had a doctor’s appointment to check my cervix, strip my membranes, and decide if I would be good to go to be induced the following day. I had turned 40 weeks that Sunday and was planning for a vaginal birth after cesarean. An induction would include breaking my waters and as little as pitocin as possible to avoid adding more risk for a uterine rupture. The doctor checked my cervix- I was a three. All the uncomfortable braxton hicks I had been having all week weren’t for nothing after all. I was scheduled to be induced the next day. In a last attempt to get my labor going naturally, my doctor stripped my membranes. This process does not feel great, by the way. I was sent on my way with instructions to do some walking, but also lots of crawling and crazy yoga moves to get the baby to turn her face around.
The second I walked out of the doctor’s office, I knew I wasn’t going to make it till the next day. Contractions had already started and I was feeling sick to my stomach. Naturally, I went to Target. I shopped like one does when in labor. I came home, cleaned my house like crazy, made sure my bag was totally packed, fed my family and made sure the kids knew I probably wouldn’t be home in the morning when they woke up, but that Adam would pick them up to meet the new baby when Carson got home from school. Finally, I settled into the bathtub to try and relax a little and really start counting contractions. Sitting in the bath, my contractions went from 5 minutes apart to 2 minutes apart. As soon as I got out, I felt some pressure and lost my mucous plug. The contractions started getting stronger quickly and since they were already 2 minutes apart and the hospital is about 30 minutes away, I decided we better start heading over.
We called a babysitter over to spend the night with the kids and headed to the hospital. When we got there, they checked me-still a 3. Wah wah. They told me to go walk the halls and then they’d check me again in an hour to see if they were going to let me stay. I walked with Adam for like 20 mins, but then got too tired. It was about 11 pm at this point, I think. I decided to go back to my room and sit on the ball to help get through the contractions. They came to check me after an hour- I was a 4.5. I was staying. Part of me wished it was nothing and that I could just go back home to get some sleep. I was so tired already.
The night continued on pretty slowly. My contractions never stopped being 2 minutes apart so I never slept. I’d rest my eyes and then they’d pop back open with shocking pain that would shoot my whole body up into a rocking motion. I thought maybe I could relax more in the bath so my nurse ran one for me and I hopped in. Yep, hopped. Not. Anyway, labor started getting pretty intense in there. My nurse kept asking me if she should get Adam and I told her I’d rather be alone. I always feel this way when I’m in pain. I sat in that bath and grunted through the contradictions. I was reasonably quiet. My nurses kept commenting on how I must have a very high pain tolerance because I was so quiet and calm. I assured her that I was in severe pain, I’m just not a screamer. After my bath, I was checked again. This time I was a 7. I asked for the fentanyl to give me some temporary relief from the pain so I could rest. It made me feel super dizzy through one contraction and then it was totally gone. Totally stupid. Don’t recommend wasting your money on that one.
After that, I was rocking in my bed, grunting and feeling close to losing my mind with every super painful contraction. I sat up through one particularly painful contraction and felt an insane amount of pressure and then apparently there was a pop and then a flood. The nurse came in quickly when she heard me say, “Holy crap, Adam! My water just broke!” She cleaned up my bed and got me a new gown and then checked me again. I was a 9. At this point, my mind was lost. Adam brought me a cold rag to cover my face, I was pulling my own hair, crying, saying crazy things and blubbering out how I couldn’t do this anymore and I should have done an epidural. I asked for the spinal narcotic shot. They provided. The nurse anesthetist told me I had to hold still which made me go totally nuts trying to get through a contraction. Once she was done she told me to keep my legs down so it could work. This task was impossible. My body was convulsing into a ball of pain. I heard the anesthetist tell the nurse it wasn’t going to work because it was clear I was already in transition and it was time. They both kept asking me questions, but I couldn’t answer. I could hear them, but they sounded far away and I was in pain zone: it was just me and the pain. Finally, my nurse asked me if I was ready to push. After a solid minute of me trying to process her voice, I grumbled that I didn’t know. I knew I was, but I wasn’t sure I was ready to take on more pain. Sure enough, I was a 10.The nurse called my doctor in. I had the nurse do my counting through the pushing. I started with 3 pushes for each contraction. In between every contraction, I passed out. It was silent and then I would wake up in unimaginable pain and for a split second I couldn’t remember where I was and then it would be time to push again. I pushed so hard. It brought some relief knowing that this was almost over. I started doing 4 pushes per contraction and then she was right there…ready to come out. I got to feel the top of her head, which is crazy weird when the head is still up in you. My doctor told me she wanted to do an episiotomy because her face never did turn around and there wasn’t any room left for her whole head to come out. I declined and then after a couple more contractions, the doctor decided that it was just going to have to be done. Our baby girl arrived in the next contraction.
When they placed our new baby on my chest, the pain was completely gone. I forgot how exhausted and drained of energy I was. There is nothing like seeing and holding your baby for the first time. It is the most spiritual experience I’ve been lucky to have three times. The veil to heaven is so thin, like heaven is all around this very moment. You can feel Heavenly Father gifting you this child, and placing His trust in you to care and love for His spirit child that has been placed in this human body made by two people in love. There is always a hush in the room. It’s an undeniable feeling that there is a God. And God is good.
Meet Spencer Juliet Rogers
Born on December 10, 2014
Weighing 8 lbs. 5 oz